Lotus Psychotherapy

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Tools for Managing Anxiety

Anxiety: whether it’s a constant worry, or full-scale paralyzing fear, we’ve all experienced this intense and unpleasant emotion. And, truth is -- we almost certainly will experience it again, and again, and again.

So, what is anxiety?

The American Psychological Association offers this definition: anxiety is “an emotion characterized by feelings of tension, worried thoughts and physical changes like increased blood pressure”. I prefer to think of anxiety as a wanna-be superhero. It thinks its job is to prepare you for the worst-case scenario and protect you from even the most unlikely of outcomes. You have an upcoming exam? Anxiety says, “you are probably going to fail,” hoping this will urge you to study harder. Making new friends? Anxiety says, “don’t put yourself out there, you’ll probably get rejected”. Unfortunately, anxiety coming to the rescue doesn’t always help. In fact, anxious thoughts often end up getting in the way of us living and feeling our best.

When anxiety shows up

Anxiety often swoops in on the scene when we’re experiencing uncertainty. This is one of the reasons we might notice a lot of anxiety in our teen years. Deciding where (or whether) to attend college, what kind of career we might pursue, or how to fit in can feel like a lot. In high school and college we’re often balancing all those uncertainties and more at the same time. Meanwhile, anxiety is trying to predict all the ways we could stumble to keep us safe. Helpful, right? Well, not exactly. The thing is, when we focus our attention on the pitfalls, there’s no mental energy left for potential positive outcomes, or more importantly, the present moment.

How do we manage Anxiety?

If we have to accept that anxiety will be our consistent companion through and beyond our teen years, then we better learn how to manage it and even befriend it. There are many skills and techniques we can use to help reduce anxiety in the moment. DBT (check out our skills training groups!) can help us learn how to better regulate our emotions and tolerate stress. I’d love to share two tools with you today, that you can use discretely anywhere, anytime. 

Tool #1

The first grounding technique many of my clients have found helpful in reducing anxiety symptoms is called “square breath”. This exercise is simple, and you can repeat it as many times as you want until you feel calmer. In fact, the Navy SEALS use this technique to calm their nerves before combat. Let’s give it a try now…

Start by inhaling slowly on a count of four: 1, 2, 3, 4.

Now hold your breath for a count of four: 1, 2, 3, 4.

Now, exhale slowly on a count of four: 1, 2, 3, 4.

And once again, hold your breath for a count of four: 1, 2, 3, 4.

Repeat these 4 steps a few times in a row, and see how you feel! 

Box breathing activates the parasympathetic nervous system, which is responsible for our bodies’ rest and digest response, and regulates our heart rate variability.

Tool #2

The second technique is called “five, four, three, two, one.” This mindfulness exercise can help ground you in the present in the midst of intense anxiety and even panic. Here’s how:

  1. Take a look around you and name FIVE things you can see. It doesn’t really matter what, it could be objects, people, plants, or animals in your surrounding environment. Focus on each item for a moment and curiously notice every detail. Its color, shape, texture.

  2. Turn your focus to FOUR things you can touch. Touch each objects and pay attention to the sensations you find there. Is it smooth? coarse? cold? is it heavy?

  3. Tune into THREE things you can hear. Three distinct sounds. It could be the blaring horns of passing traffic, the thrum of the dishwasher or birds chattering outside your window. Without judgement, notice what you can about these sounds.

  4. Shift your attention once again to TWO things you can smell in your environment. The scents might be pleasant or unpleasant, subtle or pungent. Just notice what you can about each scent.

  5. Lastly focus on ONE thing you can taste. Don’t worry, you don’t need a snack on hand. You can simply focus on the lingering taste of the last thing you ate, or the fading flavor of toothpaste from your last brush. Is it sweet? bitter? sour?

    Anxiety demands that our consciousness constrict, tightening around worrisome thoughts or alarming sensations. This technique helps to loosen and expand our consciousness beyond these thoughts and feelings.

Begin Anxiety Treatment in Westchester, NY

Dealing with anxiety isn’t easy, but we don’t have to do it alone. Our team of caring therapists are happy to help you addressing and overcome the anxiety symptoms affecting you most. You can start your therapy journey with Lotus Psychotherapy by following these steps:

Other Services Offered At Lotus Psychotherapy

Anxiety therapy isn’t the only service offered at Lotus Psychotherapy. Our therapists know that you may face many different challenges in life and that you may benefit from a variety of in-person and online therapy services. Our talented team offers a wide range of therapy services at our White Plains, NY office and online including therapy for depression, trauma, and stress. In addition to online therapy, we also offer DBT therapy, individual therapy, anxiety therapy, therapy for new and expecting parents, and group therapy and workshops.